how to help a new parent (when you dont have kids of your own and wouldnt have the first idea where to start!)

about 13 years ago someone i knew had a baby, so i spent about a third of my weekly wage and bought her a fluffy blue teddy bear and a big bunch of flowers.  i felt good about it, my friend was probably wishing that i had of given her nothing. the only present i probably gave her was a bit of guilt she felt when she left the flowers in the hospital rubbish bin - actually she was most likely too tired and busy to even give the flowers and bear a second thought.

fast forward to late 2008 when i had my son & i too faced a similar predicament.  it wasn't until i had my son and became a parent did i realise the error of my ways.  flowers? teddy bears? useless and a waste of space and time.  (i do not hate teddy bears - my son LOVES teddy bears now, in fact he plays with them heaps now).

things i wanted when i was a new mum: a personal chef to prepare all my meals & snacks & make me me cups of tea that stay warm long enough for me to drink, a masseuse (to try to get a small amount of circulation happening), a cleaner (one that does all the washing too) & a doorman to answer the door and deal with the constant stream of  guests visiting the new bub. 

well back to reality....

here is a list of things that are really helpful when you are a new parent, if you dont have kids yourself its really difficult to know what to get. 

help a new parent by:

• ask whether they want hospital visitors, it might seem like a nice idea to surprise new parents with a hospital visit but it can be unwanted when there is a constant stream of nurses, doctor, physiotherapist, nutritionist, lactation consultant, priest (i kid you not a priest called into my room for a chat 24 hours after i has a caesarean, we politely sent him on his way. speaking to a priest was low on my list of priorities that day) another visitor can be an annoyance.

• do not arrive to the home of the new parents empty-handed, they are tired and overwhelmed and need all the help they can get, dont ask just bring. 
• good ideas are:
• NUTS (packed full of nutrition, great for snacking when too busy to make a square meal)
• MILK (the new parents have probably had a stream of visitors and made endless cups of tea, not only are you helping but you are assured of getting a cuppa with milk too so everyone wins!)
• BREAD (too busy to go to shops)
• A HOT MEAL OR MEALS (if you love cooking make a simple casserole, stroganoff or soup, lots of new parents rely on takeaways in the initial weeks of parenthood so a home-cooked meal is brilliant). package up into plastic takeaway containers so they can just remove from freezer and re-heat when convenient.

• if you are feeling particularly generous some other suggestions are:

• lovely cloth wipes - some parents use disposable wipes, some use cloth wipes but unlike nappies no parent is going to be offended by a gift of lovely cloth wipes.  when i was a new mum i started off with disposable wipes until we realised we preferred cloth.  
• a nappy wash service - if you know your new parents are using cloth nappies you could help relieve some of the massive burden of washing/drying.
• a hamper of food.
• one of our gift boxes filled with beautiful tasty and practical goods! (wont break the bank and its all made here in Australia)

What did you find particularly useful when you became a mum (or dad)?

What would you suggest as a great gift for a new parent?